Many people do not agree with our family size and don’t have a problem voicing their opinion either. I would say at least 70% of people who think we have too many children are Christians. It has always baffled me how people who in one breath say that children are a blessing, can in the next breath say that we shouldn’t have any more children.
The number one reason why we shouldn’t have any more children is because, “You can’t afford to have more.” I find this a weak excuse for a number of reasons.
- They do not know our financial state. While they may have an idea of how much my husband earns, they do not know how much debt we have nor how we spend our money. They often say that I need to go get a job, but they don’t realize that it would cost us MORE for me to work. Not only do we not have daycare costs, but I save money by cooking all our meals from scratch, shopping to get the best deals, make clothes for our children, shop resale and consignment shops, etc. If I was working full-time, I would not have the time to do those things.
- We have different values so we don’t spend our money the same as them. Most people think that children need vacations every year, participate in multiple sports, need the latest and greatest fashions, think that children shouldn’t work because they “just need to be kids.” We value teaching our children hard work, team work through working as a family not by sports, putting others before themselves, serving, etc. We spend time as a family on a regular basis because we home school so we don’t need vacations for “family time”. That being said, we still do vacations some times but only when we can pay cash for the trip and we all work hard together to be able to do that.
- And the most important reason why that is a weak excuse–because we put our faith in God and not in man. We trust God to provide for us. We don’t worry about having a large bank account or even lots of food stored up.
“It is better to trust in the Lord than to put confidence in man. It is better to trust in the Lord than to put confidence in princes.” ~ Psalm 118:8-9
God has proved Himself over and over for us. We have never gone hungry. We have never gone without clothes. We have never gone cold in the winter. We’ve always had a roof over our heads. We have always been able to pay our bills. We trust in Him.
We don’t put our confidence in government programs either. Was there a short time when we participated in some government help, yes. The whole time we accepted help from the government, we just felt something was wrong. We realized that we were putting our faith in the “man” instead of God. Since leaving government assistance behind, we have paid off debt, paid for medical expenses ourselves, expanded our family, and are only a few years away from being debt free.
The naysayers will say that we are only able to succeed in those things because of help from other people. In short, yes, they are right. However, we know that God places those people in our lives for that very reason. We know that God blesses them when they bless us. That is how things are supposed to work. Christ tells us to care for one another. If we see someone in need, we are to help in whatever way we are able. We are supposed to take care of our neighbor, not leave them to run to the government to do it. And even though we often are the blessed recipients of help from others, we still help others when we see the need and are able to fill it. We may not bless others in the same way others bless us, but we help in how God has enabled us to help others.
People may think we are crazy for putting our trust in the Lord, but we think others are crazy for NOT putting their trust in Him! “It is better to trust in the Lord”!